My doll is sleeping | English version

Author’s note: Cuando era niña pase por el trauma que me marcaría por el resto de mi vida. Solía dormir mucho para evadir mi realidad, dormía casi todo el día. Esta entrada me recuerda a esos momentos.

My doll is sleeping

And I’m not sure how to wake her up,

I don’t know how long she’s been like this,

and I don’t really know how she went from being the most radiant ray of sun

 to only being a little girl who dreams of never opening her eyes.

She’s not responding

I don’t know what’s happening,

I don’t know how to help her

and I don’t understand why she’s still thinking

of carrying the world’s weight alone.

I don’t know if it’s okay to wake her up...

Maybe she’s much happier there, immerse inside that dream of hers

maybe there she’s able to fly and remembers absolutely nothing,

maybe there she’s able to smile and runs without fearing her heart will stop her.

How do you light up a star that lost its light from weeping so much?

The sky is mourning,

hell has won a battle against it,

her eyes got lost in between her eyelids,

There is nothing lighting up my house any longer.

My doll is sleeping

and I don’t know if it’s okay to wake her up.

I sing to her at night so she comes back,

To tell her I need her,

To ask for forgiveness for not taking care of her,

I’ve seen her being strong,

but I didn’t count with the fact that the world

cannot put up with so much magic. 

My doll is sleeping, and she might never wake up...

Nobody endures so many heartbreaks

How do you ask an angel to wake up if her wings were taken off her?

I sent you to Sodoma without an armour and 

you came out alive...

But how do I ask you to live again?